There was something I was hiding from you. It was something personal, I was not really going to advertise it. I was ashamed.

I was almost thrown out of Auburn. My grades were not satisfactory in such a way that they would allow me to stay had I not met with a minimal GPA. This semester was a deciding time for that. If I did not meet their set requirements I would be dropped from the college and I can tell you that I would not be capable of return.

I am pleased to inform you all that I have met and exceeded these expectations. I also feel that it is somewhat due to you. Another little advertised fact is that I only had one friend in the city of Auburn. I didn’t talk to him often at all. My roommates are best friends and they never spoke to me… I was alone in the world. Not unlike John at all. And then I found my Sherlock. If I had stayed out, stayed alone and meaningless I would have succumbed to my failure and … well I can’t really tell you what would have become of me. Partially because I am unsure and partially beause I am sure and it is something to be left unsaid.

I was a lonely little girl in her room and you are my funny man in a big blue box. I was so alone and I owe you so much. You are better than a letter addressed with green ink and delivered in the beak of an owl. You are better than a man with a hammer dropping from the sky in a crisis. You are better than a scylladex or slime pies or jam. You are the eagles that came in to pick me up right before the magma burned me.

Just so that you know, I will never leave because a few people are displeased with me. You can never please the whole world at once. The people that sent those messages were not good friends of mine. What friends would say those things? And if they are not my friends then why should I listen? I won’t. Even if I had not been attending the school, my cards would have found their way to you. In fact, this year, I hope to expand to other schools. I hope to reach out to Tuscaloosa and spread the fellowship as far as I can. I want everyone to be able to have a part of this. I think we can agree that this was a good thing. The messages that I recieved in response to those morons… I am so touched. I never thought that those words would be spoken to me. I never dreamed I could be so important. My only aim is to make you feel important as well. I am going to work hard to make as many cards as I can and improve over the summer for you. You’re all worth it. You make the spirit sing.

Thank you sincerely from the bottom of my heart.

I remain your obedient and loyal artist,

IA

The answer is that there is no answer. The answer I was looking for would take you one step further. 

“I don’t know.”

That was all I was looking for. If there is no answer then you cannot know the answer. The answer is therefore “I don’t know.” I am well aware that that is still an answer and that by having an answer you do, in fact, know the answer. That thought was presented to me after I had set the answer in stone and I was not going to go back and change it. It would not be fair.

The closest we came were the few people that sent in the quote from the hatter. It looked like Kelly would win until Emily sent in this:

Apparently, in the book, the response it, “I haven’t the slightest idea.” Which is accurate for me, haha.

She was the closest to admitting that she did not know. This was also an exercise in seeing if anyone would admit to not knowing the answer. As nerds and geeks we seek out as many answers as we can possibly get our hands on. I was interested to see if anyone would say they didn’t know. I understand that not many people would send an ask just to say “hey bro, I have no clue!” but something is always better than nothing, no?

Please try not to hate me for this.

Congrats to thatsjustemily, our winner! Please message me a time you will be able to pick up your card and I will meet you for the exchange. 

Please don’t hate me for this.

You all gave in some truly splendid answers for this. Really. The things you came up with completely baffled me on many levels. Truly it was brilliant. All of it. It was beautiful and lovely and I think we all had fun. Thank you all for your patience and participation. 

-IA